Blonde Cook Book: MONDAY: It’s fun to cook for Bob. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls. TUESDAY: Bob wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn’t dress. What a surprise when … Read more
There were two blondes going hunting. It was getting late, so one of the blondes said to the other that she heard if you ever get lost in the woods, you should shoot three shots into the air. So she did. A few hours went by, and she fired three more shots into the air. … Read more
A brunette woman goes into the doctor’s office. She tells the doctor, “It hurts all over my body.” He says, “Point to where it hurts.” She points to her shoulder and yells, “OUCH!” She then points to her hip and yells, “OUCH!” Finally, she points to her knee and screams in pain, “OUCH!!!” The doctor … Read more
Eleven women were clinging precariously to a wildly swinging rope suspended from a crumbling outcropping on Mount Everest. Ten were blonde, one was a brunette. As a group, they decided that one of the party should let go. If that didn’t happen, the rope would break and everyone would perish. For an agonizing few moments, … Read more
Two telephone company crews were putting up telephone poles. At the end of the day, the company foreman asked the first crew how many poles they had put in the ground. “Fifteen,” was the answer. “Not bad, not bad at all,” the foreman said. Turning to the blonde crew, he asked how many they had … Read more
One day, a blonde’s neighbor goes over to her house, sees the blonde crying, and asks her what happened. The blonde said that her mother had passed away. The neighbor made her some coffee, calmed her down a little, and then left. The next day, the neighbor went back over to the house and found … Read more
One day, two blondes each bought a pig. The problem they were having was telling the two pigs apart. So, the first blonde had an idea: She said, “I’ll cut my pig’s tail off, then we will know the difference.” So she cut her pig’s tail off. That night the pigs got in a fight … Read more
Three blondes were all vying for the last available position on the local police force. The detective conducting the interview looked at the three of them and said, “So you all want to be a cop, eh?” The blondes all nodded. The detective got up, opened a file drawer and pulled out a file folder. … Read more
A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking along their island beach when one sees a bottle lying on the ground. It turns out there’s a genie in it, so they each get one wish. The brunette says, “I miss my family, I wish I was home again.” With a puff of smoke, she … Read more
A young blonde was on vacation in the depths of Louisiana. She wanted a pair of genuine alligator shoes in the worst way, but was very reluctant to pay the high prices the local vendors were asking. After becoming very frustrated with the “no haggle” attitude of one of the shopkeepers, the blonde shouted, “Maybe … Read more