A businessman was interviewing applicants for the position of divisional manager. He devised a simple test to select the most suitable person for the job. He asked each applicant the question, “What is two and two?” The first interviewee was a journalist. His answer was “Twenty-two.” The second applicant was an engineer. He pulled out … Read more
In our complex technical environment, there are many opportunities for a competent technical individual to be the subject of technical harassment. Sometimes it can be so subtle that you may not even be aware you are being harassed. Worse yet, you may inadvertently technically harass another person by accident. Following are some guidelines to help … Read more
To: All Employees Subject: Special High Intensity Training Dear Team, In order to ensure that we continue to produce the highest quality work possible, it will be our policy to keep all employees well-trained through our program of Special High Intensity Training (S.H.I.T.). We are committed to providing our employees with more S.H.I.T. than any … Read more
FROM: OPERATIONS SUBJECT: Restroom Use Policy In the past, employees were permitted to make trips to the restroom under informal guidelines. Effective immediately, a Restroom Trip Policy will be established to provide a more consistent method of accounting for each employee’s restroom time and ensuring equal treatment of all employees. Under the policy, a “Restroom … Read more
Are you overworked, underpaid, over-regulated, under-leisured, and under-benefited? Take heart! Not only could it be worse, it has been. This notice was found in the ruins of a London office building. It was dated 1852.
The tribal wisdom of the Dakota Indians, passed on from one generation to the next, says that when you discover you are riding a dead horse, the best strategy is to dismount. However, in modern business and government, because of the heavy investment factors to be taken into consideration, often other strategies have to be … Read more
It has come to our attention recently that many of you have been turning in timesheets that specify large amounts of “Miscellaneous Unproductive Time” (Code 5309). However, we need to know exactly what you are doing during your unproductive time.
A feisty 70-year-old woman had to call a furnace repairman. After a quick inspection, the man put some oil into the motor and handed her a $70 bill for labor. “Labor charges!” she exclaimed. “It only took you five minutes.” The repairman explained that his company had a minimum one-hour charge on every house call. … Read more
A local business was looking for office help. They put a sign in the window, stating the following: “HELP WANTED. Must be able to type, must be good with a computer, and must be bilingual. We are an Equal Opportunity Employer.” A short time afterward, a dog trotted up to the window, saw the sign, … Read more
FROM: Pat Smith, Human Resources Director TO: Everyone RE: Christmas Party DATE: December 1 I’m happy to inform you that the company Christmas Party will take place on December 23, starting at noon in the banquet room at Luigi’s Open Pit Barbecue. No-host bar, but plenty of eggnog! We’ll have a small band playing traditional … Read more