Two young boys were spending the night at their grandparents. At bedtime, the two boys knelt beside their beds to say their prayers. The youngest one began praying at the top of his lungs, “I PRAY FOR A BICYCLE… I PRAY FOR A NEW NINTENDO… I PRAY FOR A NEW VCR…” His older brother leaned … Read more
A man comes to dinner at a new friend’s house. While they eat, the new friend’s small son keeps staring at the guest. Finally, the guest says, “Why are you staring at me like that, young fellow?” The kid says, “Daddy told me you were a self-made man.” “I am.” “Well, why did you make … Read more
A little boy returning home from school said to his mother, “Mom, what’s sex?” His mother, who believed in all the most modern educational theories, gave him a detailed explanation, covering all aspects of the tricky subject. When she had finished, the little lad produced an enrollment form which he had brought home from school … Read more
At one point during a game, the coach said to one of his young players, “Do you understand what cooperation is? What a team is?” The little boy nodded in the affirmative. “Do you understand that what matters is whether we win together as a team?” The little boy nodded yes. “So,” the coach continued, … Read more
It’s the Spring of 1957 and Bobby goes to pick up his date. He’s a pretty hip guy with his own car. When he goes to the front door, the girl’s father answers and invites him in. “Carrie’s not ready yet, so why don’t you have a seat?” he says. “That’s cool,” says Bobby. Carrie’s … Read more
Two little kids, aged six and eight, decide it’s time to learn how to swear. So, the eight-year-old says to the six-year-old, “Okay, you say ‘damn’ and I’ll say ‘hell’.” All excited about their plan, they troop downstairs, where their mother asks them what they’d like for breakfast. “Aw, hell,” says the eight-year-old, “gimme some … Read more
A professor of chemistry wanted to teach his 5th-grade class a lesson about the evils of liquor, so he produced an experiment that involved a glass of water, a glass of whiskey, and two worms. “Now, class, closely observe the worms,” said the professor while putting a worm into the water. The worm in the … Read more
Little Johnny’s father asked him, “Do you know about the birds and the bees?” “I don’t want to know!” little Johnny said, bursting into tears. Confused, the father asked little Johnny what was wrong. “Oh dad,” Little Johnny sobbed, “At age six I got the ‘there’s no Santa’ speech. At age seven I got the … Read more
A mother took her little boy to church. While in church, the little boy said, “Mommy, I have to pee.” The mother said to the little boy, “It’s not appropriate to say the word ‘pee’ in church. So, from now on whenever you have to ‘pee,’ just tell me that you have to ‘whisper.’” The … Read more
A mother, father, and young son are visiting the circus. The elephants walk out into the circus ring, and the little boy says to his mother, “What’s that?” “That’s the elephant’s tail,” she replies. “No, under the tail,” says the youngster. The mother is clearly embarrassed and says, “Oh, nothing.” The boy turns to his … Read more