A gentleman, fresh out of gift ideas, bought his mother-in-law a large plot in an expensive cemetery. On her next birthday, he bought her nothing. She was quick to comment, loud and long, on his thoughtlessness. The gentleman said only one thing – “Well, you haven’t used the gift I gave you last year.”
A seven-year-old boy goes to the hospital with his grandmother to visit his grandfather. When they arrive, he runs ahead of his granny and bursts into his grandpa’s room. “Grandpa, as soon as Grandma comes into the room, make a noise like a frog,” he shouted. “What for?” asked his grandpa. “Grandma said that as … Read more
A curious eleven-year-old boy asked his mother, “Is God male or female?” She hesitated for a brief moment and responded, “God is both male and female.” Still curious, he asked, “Is God black or white?” She responded along the same line, “God is both black and white.” Finally, the boy asked, “Is God gay or … Read more
A Jewish boy comes home from school and tells his mother he’s been given a part in the school play. “Wonderful. What part is it?” The boy says, “I play the part of the Jewish husband.” The mother scowls and says, “Go back and tell the teacher you want a speaking part.”
Once upon a time, three vampires met in some place at night. Apparently, each one of them was boasting about their vampiric abilities to one another. Vampire A said, “Look at that mansion over there! I can finish all of its inhabitants within 10 minutes!” And so he flew to the mansion. Nine minutes later, … Read more
A young Indian boy goes to his mother one day with a puzzled look on his face. “Say, Mom, why is my bigger brother named Mighty Storm?” “Because he was conceived during a mighty storm,” she said. Then he asked, “Why is my sister named Cornflower?” “Well, your father and I were in a cornfield … Read more
A woman is in the hospital and just had twins, a boy and a girl. But no one is there with her except her brother. The nurse comes into the room after the delivery and says, “Your brother has taken the liberty to name the children.” The new mother says, “Oh no, he probably gave … Read more