An American couple was sitting outside a souvenir shop in the desert, waiting for their tour bus. A local salesman approached them. After an impassioned sales pitch yielded no results, the salesman eyed the wife thoughtfully. “I’ll give you 100 camels for your wife,” he offered. The husband looked stunned, and there was an awkward … Read more
A man walks into a drug store with his 8-year-old son. They happen to walk by the condom display, and the boy asks, “What are these, Dad?” The man matter-of-factly replies, “Those are called condoms, son. Men use them to have safe sex.” “Oh, I see,” replied the boy pensively. “Yes, I’ve heard of that … Read more
When met by a long procession of people led by a man with a dog, Joe asked the man: “Who died?” “My mother-in-law.” “How?” Joe asked. “The dog bit her.” “Can I borrow the dog?” “Get in line.”
Bill and Hillary are out driving in the country near Hillary’s hometown. They are low on fuel, so Bill pulls into a gas station for a fill-up. The attendant comes out and begins to pump gas into the first couple’s tank. As he is doing this, he looks into the passenger window. “Hey, Hillary. We … Read more
A man and his wife were in a fancy restaurant. While ordering, they noticed that the waiter had a spoon in his shirt pocket, and after looking around, they observed the other waiters and busboys each had a similar spoon. So the husband says, “What’s with the spoon?” The waiter said, “Well, we had this … Read more
The Shortest Books Ever Written: – 1000 Years of German Humor – Everything Men Know About Women – The Code of Ethics for Lawyers – Italian War Heroes – Who’s Who in Puerto Rico – Americans’ Guide to Etiquette – Royal Family’s Guide to Good Marriages – Safe Places to Travel in the USA – … Read more
Joe asks his wife, Karen, what she wants for their 40th wedding anniversary. “Would you like a new mink coat?” he asks. “Not really,” says Karen. “Well, how about a new Mercedes sports car?” says Joe. “No,” she responds. “What about a new vacation home in the country?” he suggests. She again rejects his offer … Read more
A man in Phoenix calls his son in New York the day before Thanksgiving and says, “I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough.” “Pop, what are you talking about?” the son screams. “We can’t stand the sight … Read more
Sadie’s husband Jake has been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet his faithful wife stays by his bedside day and night. One night, Jake comes to and motions for her to come closer. He says, “My Sadie, you have been with me through all the bad times. When I got … Read more
Once there was a man who every week bought a lottery ticket in the local liquor store. He really didn’t expect to win until one day he jumped in joy when he found out that he won 30 million dollars. The man immediately ran to his car, drove home at full speed, pulled up the … Read more