A man with a winking problem is applying for a position as a sales representative for a large firm. The interviewer looks over his papers and says, “This is phenomenal. You’ve graduated from the best schools; your recommendations are wonderful, and your experience is unparalleled. Normally, we’d hire you without a second thought. However, a … Read more
An elderly man in Phoenix calls his son Bob in New York and says, “I hate to ruin your day, but your mother and I are divorcing. Forty-five years of misery is enough! I’m sick of her, and I’m sick of talking about this, so call your sister in Boston and tell her,” and then … Read more
An elderly man and his wife decided to separate. Before being allowed to do so legally, the Family Court insisted they undergo some counselling from the marriage guidance service to see if their union could be saved. The counsellor did her best, but to no avail. The old folk were absolutely determined to go through … Read more
A man who was called to testify at the IRS asked his accountant for advice on what to wear. “Wear your shabbiest clothing. Let him think you are a pauper,” the accountant replied. Then he asked his lawyer the same question but got the opposite advice. “Do not let them intimidate you. Wear your most … Read more
As an old man was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang. Answering, he heard his wife’s voice urgently warning him, “Herman, I just heard on the news that there’s a car going the wrong way on Route 280. Please be careful!” “It’s not just one car,” said Herman, “It’s hundreds of them!”
The day after a man lost his wife in a scuba diving accident, he was greeted by two grim-faced policemen at his door. “We’re sorry to call on you at this hour, Mr. Wilkens, but we have some information about your wife,” one of the policemen said. “Well, tell me!” the man said. The policeman … Read more
1. The toilet is blocked, and we cannot bathe the children until it is cleared. 2. I want some repairs done to my stove as it has backfired and burnt my knob off. 3. This is to let you know that there is a smell coming from the man next door. 4. I am writing … Read more