A young single guy is on a cruise ship, having the time of his life. On the second day of the cruise, the ship slams into an iceberg and begins to sink. Passengers around him are screaming, flailing, and drowning, but our guy manages to grab onto a piece of driftwood and, using every last … Read more
A man placed some flowers on the grave of his dearly departed mother and started back toward his car when his attention was diverted to another man kneeling at a grave. The man seemed to be praying with profound intensity and kept repeating, “Why did you have to die? Why did you have to die?” … Read more
A pirate walked into a bar and the bartender said, “Hey, I haven’t seen you in a while. What happened? You look terrible.” “What do you mean?” said the pirate, “I feel fine.” “What about the wooden leg? You didn’t have that before.” “Well, we were in a battle and I got hit with a … Read more
These three married couples died and when they got to the pearly gates, St. Peter told the first husband, “I can’t let you in. You let alcohol run your life. You even married a girl named Sherry.” Dejected, he turned and walked away. The next married couple stepped up, and St. Peter told the husband, … Read more
A man is out shopping and discovers a new brand of Olympic condoms. Clearly impressed, he buys a pack. Upon getting home, he announces to his wife the purchase he just made. “Olympic condoms?” she blurts, “What makes them so special?” “There are three colors,” he replies, “Gold, Silver, and Bronze.” “What color are you … Read more
A funeral service is being held for a woman who has just passed away. At the end of the service, the pallbearers are carrying the casket out when they accidentally bump into a wall, jarring the casket. They hear a faint moan. They open the casket and find that the woman is actually alive! She … Read more
A man phones home from his office and tells his wife: “Something has just come up. I have a chance to go fishing for a week. It’s the opportunity of a lifetime. We leave right away. So pack my clothes, my fishing equipment, and especially my blue silk pajamas. I’ll be home in an hour … Read more
John receives a phone call. “Hello,” he answers. The voice on the other end says, “This is Susan. We met at a party about 3 months ago.” John: “Hmm… Susan? About 3 months ago?” Susan: “Yes, it was at Bill’s house. After the party you took me home. On the way we parked and got … Read more
A Bible study group was discussing the unforeseen possibility of their sudden death. The leader of the discussion said, “We will all die someday, and none of us really know when, but if we did, we would all do a better job of preparing ourselves for that inevitable event.” Everybody shook their heads in agreement … Read more
A man enters a restaurant and while sitting at his table, notices a gorgeous woman sitting at another table, alone. He calls the waiter over and asks for the most expensive bottle of champagne to be sent over to her, knowing that if she accepts it, she is his. The waiter gets the bottle and … Read more