Two men are standing before a judge. Both men were arrested on the same day and given the assignment to devise a program to prevent others from committing crimes. After spending two days in jail, they were asked to present their ideas to the judge. The first man holds up a poster displaying two circles, … Read more
A man is stranded on a desert island, all alone for ten years. One day, he sees a speck in the horizon. He thinks to himself, “It’s not a ship.” The speck gets a little closer and he thinks, “It’s not a boat.” The speck gets even closer and he thinks, “It’s not a raft.” … Read more
A blonde tried to sell her old car. She was having a lot of problems selling it because the car had 250,000 miles on it. One day, she spoke about her problem with a brunette she worked with at a salon. The brunette told her, “There is a possibility to make the car easier to … Read more
Paddy and Seamus were flying to the U.S.A. in a jumbo jet when an hour into the flight they heard this message: “Beep beep, this is your captain speaking. We have just lost one of our four engines. Do not be alarmed, this plane is fully equipped to fly us to America on only three … Read more
Four men went golfing one day. Three of them headed to the first tee, and the fourth went into the clubhouse to take care of the bill. The three men started talking, bragging about their sons. The first man told the others, “My son is a homebuilder and he is so successful that he gave … Read more
Harold is 82 and having some prostate problems. After examining him, the doctor gives him a specimen jar and says, “Take this home with you, and try to produce a semen specimen. Stop by tomorrow and drop it off so I can run a few tests.” Harold takes the jar and heads home. The next … Read more
A veterinarian surgeon had a bad day, but when he got home from tending to all the sick animals, his wife was waiting with a long cool drink and a romantic candle-lit dinner. After dinner, they had a few more drinks and went happily to bed. At about 2:00 in the morning, the phone rang. … Read more
One night, as a couple lays down for bed, the husband starts rubbing his wife’s arm. The wife turns over and says, “I’m sorry honey, I’ve got a gynecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh.” The husband, rejected, turns over. A few minutes later, he rolls back over and taps his wife again. … Read more
An old Chinese couple is lying in bed late one night. The old man turns to his wife and says, “I want 69!” The old woman looks confused, and then asks, “Why do you want beef and broccoli now?”
How many Pentecostals does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Five – one to screw in the lightbulb and four to pray against the power of darkness!