President George W. Bush is visiting an elementary school today and he visits one of the 4th-grade classes. They are in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings. The teacher asks the President if he would like to lead the class in the discussion of the word “tragedy.” So the President … Read more
Monica Lewinsky was walking on the beach when she found a lantern washed up on the shore. She started to rub it and out popped a genie. “Oh goodie, now I will get three wishes!” she exclaimed. “No,” said the genie, “You have been very bad this year, and because of this, I can only … Read more
To the citizens of the United States of America: Following your failure to elect anybody, either a half-decent candidate or a B-movie actor as President of the USA to govern yourselves and, by extension, the free world, we hereby give notice of the revocation of your independence. Her Sovereign Majesty Queen Elizabeth II will resume … Read more
George W. Bush, in an airport lobby, noticed a man in a long flowing white robe with a long flowing white beard and flowing white hair. The man had a staff in one hand and some stone tablets under the other arm. George W. approached the man and inquired, “Aren’t you Moses?” The man ignored … Read more
“Florida Lottery” Guess what?! I won the lottery! I’m gonna be rich!! I won the Florida lottery! I’m now a multimillionaire! Can you believe it?! I’m bouncing off the walls here! You see, my ticket doesn’t have the exact winning numbers on it, but I meant to pick those winning numbers. The ticket was very … Read more
During his visit to the United States, the Pope met with President Clinton. Instead of just an hour, as scheduled, the meeting went on for two days. Finally, a weary President Clinton emerged to face the waiting news media. The President was smiling and announced the summit was a resounding success. He said he and … Read more
A man went to a doctor and said he wanted to be able to get a job at the local Post Office, but unfortunately, he was too smart. The doctor asked him his IQ, and when he gave a three-digit reply, the doctor told him that the procedure would have to involve the removal of … Read more
Clinton died and went to heaven – or to be more accurate – approached the Pearly Gates. After knocking at the gates, St. Peter appeared. “Who goes there?” inquired St. Peter. “‘Tis I, your lordship, President Bill Clinton.” “And what do you want?” asked St. Peter. “Lemme in!” replied Clinton. “Soooo,” pondered Peter. “What bad … Read more
“Former President Bush parachuted with an Army Ranger holding him so he wouldn’t get hurt on his 80th birthday. This is the same method they use when his son rides a bike.” – Craig Kilborn
“The Bushes hosted their predecessors at the White House yesterday for the official unveiling of Bill and Hillary Clinton’s White House portraits. The occasion moved the current commander-in-chief to a rare show of gracious bipartisanship. Bush then handed the mic over to Clinton. It’s been a long time since this skilled orator spoke in the … Read more