If you had bought $1000 worth of Nortel stock one year ago, it would now be worth $49.
With Enron, you would have $16 of the original $1,000.
With WorldCom, you would have less than $5 left.
If you had bought $1,000 worth of beer one year ago, drank all the beer, then turned in the cans for the deposit, you would have $214.
Clearly, the best investment is to drink heavily and recycle.