Farmer Joe decided his injuries from the accident were serious enough to take the trucking company responsible for the accident to court. In court, the trucking company’s fancy lawyer was questioning Farmer Joe. “Didn’t you say, at the scene of the accident, ‘I’m fine,’” said the lawyer. Farmer Joe responded, “Well I’ll tell you what … Read more
During the “rush hour” at Houston’s Hobby Airport, a flight was delayed due to a mechanical problem. Since they needed the gate for another flight, the aircraft was backed away from the gate while the maintenance crew worked on it. They were then told the new gate number, which was some distance away. Everyone moved … Read more
Jews for centuries have had outstanding people in many fields of science and research. But, in the year 1639, in a small Polish town, a 14-year-old Jewish boy named Sidney started his own scientific investigations. Sidney, with his 12-year-old sister Sophie in tow, caught a large bullfrog in a local pond. Sidney began the experiment … Read more
Catholic Math Little Tommy was doing very badly in math. His parents had tried everything: flash cards, special learning centers, in short, everything they could think of. Finally, in a last-ditch effort, they took Tommy down and enrolled him in the local Catholic school. After the first day, little Tommy came home with a very … Read more
Paddy just arrived in America from Ireland on holiday. Never having seen a baseball game before, he decides that now would be a good time. So, he goes to the park and gets himself a bleacher seat. Paddy sees a guy step up to the plate with a stick in his hand. The guy standing … Read more
A Marine colonel on his way home from work at the Pentagon came to a dead halt in traffic and thought to himself, “Wow, this traffic seems worse than usual. Nothing’s even moving.” He notices a police officer walking back and forth between the lines of cars so he rolls down his window and asks, … Read more
This guy buys a parrot. Every morning he stands in front of the cage and asks in a pleasant voice, “Can you talk?” This goes on for weeks with absolutely no response from the bird. Finally one morning, totally fed up, he shouts, “CAN YOU TALK, YOU STUPID CREATURE? CAN YOU TALK?” The bird looks … Read more
A Martian landed in the country. He went up to a farmhouse and knocked on the door. He told the farmer he would give him $1,000,000 for his flock of sheep. The farmer said, “O.K.” The Martian pulled a tiny sheep out of his pocket, and it ate all the sheep. The Martian then offered … Read more
A Swede, a Norwegian, and a Dane are caught in a snowstorm on the side of a mountain. They stumble across a cave and decide to take shelter. On entering, they are greeted by an awful stench which, on inspection, turns out to come from a half-dead goat that has taken refuge in the cave. … Read more
A fellow walks into a bar, orders a drink, and asks the bartender if he’d like to hear a good Notre Dame joke. “Listen buddy,” he growled. “See those 2 big guys on your left? They were both linemen on the Notre Dame football team. And that huge fellow on your right was a world-class … Read more