A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God, USA, they decided to send it to President Bush. The President was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed … Read more
Bill Clinton, Al Gore, and George W. Bush were set to face a firing squad in a small Central American country. Bill Clinton was the first one placed against the wall and just before the order was given he yelled out, “Earthquake!” The firing squad fell into a panic and Bill jumped over the wall … Read more
A man was just coming out of anesthesia after a series of tests in the hospital, and his wife was sitting at his bedside. His eyes fluttered open, and he murmured, “You’re beautiful.” Flattered, the wife continued her vigil while he drifted back to sleep. Later, her husband woke up and said, “You’re cute.” “What … Read more
A reporter cornered George W. Bush at a press conference and said, “Many say the only reason you were elected President is due to the enormous power and influence of your father.” “That notion is ridiculous!” mocked George Jr. “It doesn’t matter how powerful the man is. He was only allowed to vote once!”
A lady bought a new Lexus. Cost a bundle. Two days later, she brought it back, complaining that the radio was not working. “Madam,” said the sales manager, “the audio system in this car is completely automatic. All you need to do is tell it what you want to listen to, and you will hear … Read more
An engineer, an accountant, a chemist, and a bureaucrat were bragging about how smart their dogs are. The engineer called to his dog, “T-square, do your stuff.” The dog took out paper and pen and drew a circle, a square, and a triangle. Everyone agreed he was smart. The accountant called, “Sliderule, do your stuff.” … Read more
Bush and Gore went fishing. Gore went on one side of the lake and Bush on the other. Later that day, Bush came back with 129 fish and Gore came back with none. Gore screamed for a revote. The next day, Bush came back with 173 fish and Gore once again screamed for a revote. … Read more
The President was awakened one night by an urgent call from the Pentagon. “Mr. President,” said the four-star general, barely able to contain himself, “There’s good news and bad news.” “Oh, no,” muttered the President, “Well, let me have the bad news first.” “The bad news, sir, is that we’ve been invaded by creatures from … Read more
Bill Clinton was walking along the beach when he stumbled upon a Genie’s lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it and lo-and-behold, a Genie appeared. Bill was amazed and asked if he got three wishes. The Genie said, “Nope…Due to inflation, constant downswing, low wages in third world countries, and fierce global competition, I … Read more
George Bush was out jogging one morning along the parkway when he tripped, fell over the bridge railing, and landed in the creek below. Before the Secret Service guys could get to him, three kids who were fishing pulled him out of the water. He was so grateful he offered the kids whatever they wanted. … Read more