A son asks his father, “What can you tell me about politics? I have to learn about it for school tomorrow.” The father thinks a little and says, “OK, son, the best way I can describe politics is to use an analogy. Let’s say that I’m a capitalist because I’m the breadwinner. Your mother will … Read more
Two terrorists are chatting. One of them opens his wallet and flips through pictures. “You see, this is my oldest. He’s a martyr. Here’s my second son. He’s a martyr, too.” The second terrorist says, gently, “Ah, they blow up so fast, don’t they?”
A 10pm curfew was imposed in Baghdad. Everybody had to be off the streets or risk being shot. However, one citizen was shot at 9.45pm. “Why did you do that?” the soldier was asked by his superior officer. “I know where he lives,” he replied, “and he wouldn’t have made it.”
Steven Spielberg was busy discussing his new action adventure about famous classical composers. Bruce Willis, Sylvester Stallone, and Arnold Schwarzenegger were in the room. “Who do you want to play?” Spielberg asked Bruce Willis. “I’ve always been a big fan of Chopin,” said Bruce. “I’ll play him.” “And you, Sylvester?” asked Spielberg. “Mozart’s the one … Read more
Hillary Clinton goes to a primary school in New York to talk about the world. After her talk, she offers question time. One little boy puts up his hand, and the Senator asks him for his name. “Kenneth.” “And what is your question, Kenneth?” “I have three questions: First – whatever happened to your medical … Read more
Bill Clinton and Senator Hillary Clinton were at a Yankees game. Before the game began, a Secret Service man came up to him and whispered something in his ear. Bill Clinton suddenly picked up Hillary and threw her out on the field. The Secret Service man came running up to him and said, “Mr. President, … Read more
A little boy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God, USA, they decided to send it to President Bush. The President was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed … Read more
An old man was critically ill. Feeling that death was near, he called his lawyer. “I want to become a Democrat. Get me a change of registration form.” “You can do it,” the lawyer said, “But why? You’ll be dead soon, why do you want to become a Democrat?” “That’s my business! Get me the … Read more
One day, there were three surgeons who were arguing loudly over who was the best surgeon. “Oh yeah,” the first one yells. “One day there was this guy who came in with all his fingers cut off. I sewed them back onto his hand, and he’s playing piano for the queen of England!” “Oh, that’s … Read more
A party of Democrats was climbing in the Alps. After several hours, they became hopelessly lost. One of them studied the map for some time, turning it up and down, sighting on distant landmarks, consulting his compass, and finally the sun. Finally, he said, ‘OK, see that big mountain over there?’ ‘Yes,’ answered the others … Read more