Prime Minister Netanyahu and the Pope have a meeting to explore ways of finding an equitable settlement to the escalating problems in the Middle East. After days of getting nowhere, they decide in desperation to settle their differences by means of a golf match. The agreement is that if the Vatican’s player wins, the Pope’s views will prevail; if Israel’s player wins, Netanyahu’s methods will be employed.
The Pope decides to recruit Arnold Palmer for the job, but his advisors object that Palmer isn’t even a Catholic. “Not to worry,” says the Pope. “We’ll make him a Cardinal.” Palmer is promptly ordained.
The match is played, with the entire world aware that the fate of peace in the Middle East is riding on the outcome. Palmer loses.
The Pope phones him after the match and gasps in disbelief, “Arnold, what happened?? We were sure you couldn’t possibly lose!”
Palmer replies, “So was I, Father. I’m devastated. I trained for weeks to prepare for this match. But who could know I’d be up against Rabbi Tiger Woods?”